Hi Baby!

My fabulous doctor (and I mean that with no sarcasm) and I have had a slight disagreement on my due date.  Without being graphic, I know *exactly* how far along I am, but according to the traditional last menstrual period, or as Boyfriend's dad like to refer to it, "Lady Day" I should be further along than I am.  Not too much to make a difference unless for the unholy reason I end up going to 42 weeks, in which case my doctor has agreed to go with my calculations vs hers when it comes to discussing an induction (which I don't want, without medical necessity).   In any case, two days after I became pregnant, and about 10 days before confirmation, Baby leaned over to me quite randomly, kissed my belly and said, "Hi Baby! I love you!"  At this point, because my cycle was obviously quite off, I had no reason whatsoever to think I was pregnant but in that moment-I knew that a couple weeks from then I would be seeing that second line on the pee stick.   Baby is so excited for her future brother or sister.  She tells me that she has a baby in her belly as well and named it Pillow.  She asks me at least once daily when she will be a big sister and when will the baby come out of my belly.     A few days ago, I asked her how her baby was going to come out of her belly.  She pointed to her mouth, grinning.  Boyfriend asked her how my baby was going to come out of my belly.  She excitedly whispered, "Her gina!"  I can't remember having a conversation with her about that, but I find it quite amusing that even she doesn't want to imagine how babies really come out.      

#2

Now that Boyfriend has shared the news that we are expecting #2, I thought I might update on how I have been doing.  Another spoiler alert-not so hot.  

  I have my good days and bad days but just like with Baby, I am feeling nauseated pretty much all day.  This pregnancy I have had the joy of actually waking up through the night because I am feeling so sick which is an extra bonus.   I also think my body remembered what the end of my pregnancy was last time and just decided to jump start all symptoms that I experienced in the last trimester.  I wake up hourly at night because my hips feel like they are being crushed by my soft bed.  I have round ligament pain of death every time I sneeze or cough, convincing me that quick motion caused my entire stomach wall to tear apart.  Boyfriend likes to test out my (lack of) bladder control by scaring the literal pee out of me.   Emotionally I am crabby and crazy-my rational mind can hear myself being a crazy woman and no matter how hard I try and tell myself to shut up (because stories of my temporary insanity will last long after #2 is here) I just can't.   I know that I sound extremely whiny, and I am a lot of the time.  But I am also extremely appreciative and grateful that I even have the opportunity to be here again.  After loss, you realize just how fragile a pregnancy could be.  I know how lucky I am, and despite all my complaining-I don't ever for a second let myself forget that the only reason I am experiencing the bad is because of the amazingly good that will be here come June.