The Boy Who Cried Wolf

We have entered the stage where Baby is testing boundaries with the truth.  Or more, how much she can get away with not telling it.  She isn't maliciously lying, and it is always about silly things (like her sister is the one who turned the music on) but even still, it is not a habit I am looking to support.  

Sisters, the perfect scapegoat.
About a week ago, I told her the story about the little boy who cried wolf.  She has asked me to retell the story at least once a day and after each retelling of the little boys demise we discuss the moral of the story.  Tonight, after I told the story she said to me, "So I was thinking about the little boy Momma..."   "Maybe he wasn't lying.  Maybe the wolf ran away when he knew the people were coming to help him out.  Or maybe the wolf was in a cave somewhere and the boy was saying he saw it there.  I just think the little boy saw a wolf and wasn't lying!" I can't decide which I should appreciate more-her ability to think about a story and take it to a deeper level or her innate desire to see the good in everyone.  Or then again, with this child, she could be pulling the ultimate con on me thinking that if she convinces me the little boy wasn't lying, then maybe she too, doesn't lie.

Monster Cookies and Other Surprises at the Perot Museum

This past week, Boyfriend and I took a hooky day (work approved so we aren't all that dangerous) and attended a blogger event at the Dallas Perot Museum, kids in tow.  It wasn't our first time there, in fact we were members in the past but this experience completely changed my viewpoint of the museum and gave me an entirely new level of appreciation. When we arrived, we were escorted to a learning lab room where we were provided a museum catered lunch while we had the opportunity to listen to guest speakers, including CEO Colleen Walker.  To be honest, I was almost tempted to totally ignore her speech so I could stuff my face with this monster sized cookie, it was that good.

Luckily though, I did pay attention and was totally inspired.  Colleen began to dive a little deeper into the Perot's stats-I knew it was a big deal for Dallas, but had no idea just how big of a deal it is.  She impressed upon us the extreme success the museum has enjoyed in just its minimal two years of service for our community, including the numerous awards and recognition.

What touched me though was when she mentioned the Perot will be a part of my children's nostalgia.   I've never thought of it that way, but I do have memories of going to the old science museum in Fair Park on field trips.  I remember first learning about bell curves, hearing the chorus of sounds as each ball fell into it's random slot creating the perfect bell curve.

I love watching my daughters learn.  You can see their eyes light up, the proverbial light bulb clicking, when they have discovered something new.  At the Perot with both the standard and traveling exhibits, there will always be those new opportunities to watch that switch flip for them.

After listening to our guest speakers we were turned loose to explore the museum, including the current special exhibit MathAlive!  While the exhibit was definitely geared towards older kids and up, my daughter still had a blast taking part in all of the interactive parts--from rock climbing, snow boarding and playing with shadows.  The entire family even took part of a "fashion shoot" where it enabled us to have a 360 degree view of our photo.

We had let our membership lapse because I was pregnant and we weren't sure how often we would be able to utilize it.  Now that the youngest is here we are going to renew at the start of the new year-that is if someone doesn't want to get us a member ship (wink, wink) for Christmas.  As a bonus for attending the event, my readers have the opportunity to receive a 15% discount if they call 214-756-5751 and mention "Teh Wifey" blog.

Candy Can Cause More Than a Bellyache

I'm a mean mom sometimes, which includes selfishly playing tricks on my kid to cause a strong reaction.  So of course I've looked forward to the years I could play the Jimmy Kimmel "I ate all your candy" joke on her the morning after Halloween.
First off, my apologies on the vertical video and I didn't even think about the fact that the sun was in her face.  Just too excited!  But as soon as I started and saw her reaction, well my excitement turned to guilt and I felt horrible.

My heart just broke watching her face go from amusement (she thought we were lying) to confusion and then the face of someone experiencing the ultimate betrayal.  Her sobs were of heartbreak for her lost candy and parents who were so mean.  I couldn't hold out for more than 10 seconds to tell her we were just playing.
Well then my little 'tude filled four year old decided to hold a grudge. 


As much as I wanted to be angry at her for throwing my phone to the ground, I only had half the heart to be upset with her.  I was the one who just hurt her feelings and she didn't have the ability to communicate that to me.   
Sadly, this experience was just one of those things that seem more fun than they really are.  Lesson learned.  I'm not against playing harmless jokes on your kids, but I should have known better to do so with my sensitive soul.  Now Pillow on the other hand-I can already tell she is going to be a hardy one, five years from now-game on!

Survival Mode

When I had Baby, someone gave me the sage advice that in the first six weeks of your new addition's life, you are in survival mode-do whatever it takes to survive.  Now having gone through two babies, I've realized this is profound guidance.  The first six weeks is such a blurry, sleepless, tumultuous experience of the highest highs and the lowest lows while getting to know your newest love.  

Once you get out of the first six weeks, you are starting to get a groove.  You hopefully have a smiling baby in your arms that makes life just that much sweeter.  You remember to eat about half the time, there are even some days you can take a shower two days in a row.  Life is good.
Moving past six weeks, your baby starts to sleep longer and longer stretches.  Three hours feels incredibly refreshing. Four hours is as relaxing as a week long vacation.  Five hours and you can take on the world.
It has been more than seven months since I have slept longer than a five hour stretch.  That is half a year people.  And in the last five months, I have only had two of those-the rest of the time it was three and a half.  Now I am back to being lucky if I get two hours at a time.
Back to survival mode.
I'm tired on a level I have never experienced. The idea of doing anything makes me want to cry.  I'm emotionally drained, I don't have the energy to engage with Boyfriend or with Baby more than on a superficial level.  I abuse the fact that they will love me no matter what and place all of my limited resources to "turning it on" at work since I haven't built that rapport with my new team yet.  When I can, I chose to be social instead of doing any chores or dreaded responsibilities because I'm definitely not going to waste what little I have on things that don't bring me happiness.
I don't know why my baby doesn't sleep.  And frankly, I don't care.  In my mommy gut, I know nothing is wrong-it is just her adaptation to the new world. I have gotten a ton of guidance or advice on how to get her to sleep longer, some I feel there is no harm in trying, others I vehemently disagree with.
I also am told, quite frequently, "Don't worry-she will sleep through the night soon enough!" as though it was something to look forward to, the ultimate end goal.  And yes, in one way I look forward to the day that I close my eyes at 10:04 p.m. and open them and see 4:47 a.m. flashing back at me.
The thing is, with this baby, my last baby, that is going to come with age.  I mourn the loss of my baby's babyhood more than I mourn the loss of my sleep.  I don't look forward to the nights where I have lost the opportunity to give her extra snuggles and kisses on her sweet, sweaty head as I nurse her, warming her belly providing her an extra couple hours of content sleep. 
So yes, I'm back to survival mode.  This age of survival in my life is proving to be much more trying than the first six weeks of either babies life.  But I wouldn't trade it for anything, I'm not going to force something that goes against my instincts, I'm not going to demand my baby meet a development before she is ready to.  So whatever it takes, we are going to get through it, my baby and me.

Happy Halloween: Blogtober14

When I asked Baby what she wanted to be for Halloween this year, she immediately said, "Elsa!"  Absolutely no issues with that, we already had the costume and I thought we could make Pillow Olaf or something else equally cute.
Then a couple of weeks ago, she changed her mind.  She said that she wanted to be Batgirl, which was confusing to me.  I asked her why and she said that L (friend (boy) at daycare) likes Batgirl.  She also has recently asked me if L would think a dress is pretty so I think it is safe to say she has her first crush.
Ignoring the fact that my four year old daughter is already trying to dress to please a boy, we went out and bought a Batgirl costume.  The cheap side of me was annoyed at spending $30 for a costume she will wear once until I saw her in it.

Originally Pillow was going to be Robin but after buying a "newborn" costume that wouldn't have fit an average size one year, let alone my 5th percentile 4 month old, we bought her a Batgirl onesie as well.  The cuteness is just overwhelming.

We took the girls to get their pictures made at one of the cheesy department store portrait studios.  We normally dislike these types of photo sessions, but wanted to get something better than my iPhone camera.  I am just totally in love with them, but I guess it really helps when the subjects are adorable.

I'm so excited to take Baby trick or treating.  Last year, she kinda got it but unfortunately our neighborhood, despite walking over two miles, only had FIVE houses with lights on.  This year we are moving one neighborhood over and hopefully will have better luck.

Also-keep an eye out for a post next week.  I am going to pull the Jimmy Kimmel joke and tell Baby I ate all her candy.

Happy Halloween!!!

30 Facts About Me: Blogtober14

 My favorite color growing up was always black, even when I was 3-4.  I've found myself in the last five years or so being more attracted to brown, but I still think of black as my favorite color.
 I have long, long hair and am obsessed with the idea of cutting it all off though I probably never will.  Mostly because it only looks this good when I get a professional blow out.

 I get horrible, debilitating caffeine headaches.  This would be a sign to most that it is time to completely quit but I just can't (or have the desire to-I love my once a day soda).  I've made it several weeks before without but continued to have headaches the entire time (though less severe as the first few days).  
 I work in Customer Service and absolutely love it.  I know it isn't for most people-but I feel most satisfied helping others.
In 8th grade, I developed a severe case of TMJ.  We didn't know it was TMJ though and I thought I had an ear infection.  I went to specialist after specialist trying to figure out why I was in so much pain (I couldn't sleep at night) until finally a dentist diagnosed me.  My treatment was to not chew for 30 days.  So I literally lived on Slim Fasts and Cheetos Puffs-I could suck on them until they were soft enough to swallow.  There has been quite the advancement in TMJ treatments in the last 15 years.
 When I was in high school I would wake up at five a.m. to volunteer on Saturday mornings.
 I wasn't the perfect kid though-when I was 14 years old I ran away from home to be with my boyfriend.  It only lasted a couple of days.
 In college I joined a sorority, Alpha Omicron Pi.

I'm cheap about almost everything except food and travel.  I will still try to find the best deals, but will not hesitate to spend money on either.  Working at an airline also helps travel be a lot less expensive.

My current work BFF and I sat next to each other on our first days and have been inseparable since. We crossed the line of work friends to in real life friends very early on.

I got shingles when I was 19. 
 Another malady you typically see in older people, the walls that hold up my bladder collapsed sometime around the age 13 so I pee my pants incredibly easy.  My friends are always there to help me out with a change of clothes if they make me laugh too hard :)
I cried when Boyfriend and I saw The Little Mermaid on Broadway in New York.
I also cry when I listen to cello music.
 You will also find me crying at random commercials, when I get frustrated and when I get angry.  It is such a joke in my family that my mom once held a spoon up to my face because I will cry over anything and I did (it really wasn't the spoon-it was her teasing me).
 I can't stand having notifications on my phone and have to look at them immediately to remove the little red pop up.
 My favorite number is 16.  In fact, my BFF and I were both born on the 16th in 1984, six months apart so we have BFF tattoos of "1684".
 Gavin Rossdale hugged me during a concert a couple of years ago.  It was my 13 year old self's dream come true.  In my mind (and all of my girlfriends who were there) this is what he looked like while running towards me.

I hated pineapple until I got pregnant with Baby.  Now I'm obsessed with it and could eat one a day.
 My cheapness does not translate over to diapers.  Pampers is the only brand I will buy.  I've tried so hard to like the off brand (especially Target) but they really just don't compare.
The towel rod in my bathroom broke several months ago.  It was stone and extremely heavy.  Instead of fixing it/throwing it away, I saved the rod to knock out any intruders that enter my home.
I suffer from intrusive/compulsive thoughts which causes extreme anxiety.  Which explains my need for number 20.
 I can't cook but I am obsessed with food related television shows.
 I am also obsessed with HGTV but haven't done anything to decorate my home in the 5 years I lived there.  Seriously-I don't have a single thing hanging on any wall.
I am proud to be a breastfeeding mother but I hate, hate, hate, HATE pumping.

 My food can't touch.
 Sunday naps on the couch is my absolute favorite extracurricular activity.

 I'm almost always cold unless it is 100 degrees outside and I'm in the direct sun.  Even when I was a lifeguard as a teen, I would need a towel to cover me as a blanket if I was in the shade.
 I've never been able to hold onto sunglasses for more than nine months.  The two longest pairs though have been my most expensive ones so that is how I justify spending money on them vs a $10 pair every month.
I have the cutest kids ever.  For real.

Whoops:Blogtober14

My most embarrassing moment...well let me just let my screen captured Snapchat (thanks Boyfriend) speak for itself.  

 

This was probably about three months after Pillow's arrival.  I still needed to wear breastpads 24/7 so I'm not sure why I forgot to wear them when I went to the gym that night.  I had just finished a yoga class and was on the elliptical and when I noticed a few funny glances my way.

Confused, I looked down and immediately saw the two tattletale signs of a breastfeeding mother.  I couldn't even pass it off as sweat-there was just no denying it.

Not really minding the excuse to end my workout early, I hoped off to take a shower but first I had to document my embarrassing moment. I've had a few more instances since under similar circumstances including at work.  

Oh the joys of being a breastfeeding mom.

Superstitions: Blogtober14

I'm not overly superstitious but I do find myself doing slightly quirky things, just in case.   For example, Boyfriend is definitely superstitious when it comes to sports.  Pillow has to wear the same exact bow every Cowboys game, the only time she wasn't wearing it was the time they lost.  

  Last night, the Cowboys were playing and of course Pillow was wearing her bow.  I put her to bed and the bow seemed to be pulling at her hair, I almost pinned it onto her sleep sack so she was still wearing it, but it wasn't against her hair.  Then I thought to myself, "If the Cowboys lose, it will be my fault and Boyfriend will be so sad."  So the bow remained.
Update: I woke this morning and noticed the bow had fallen off during the game.  It is my fault they lost, sorry Boyfriend.   There is one light that on my commute to drive through that I hate.  It is a poorly timed cycle and on a huge hill.  I drive a standard and when I get stuck at this light I have moments of temporary panic when I'm trying to go up the hill and not fall back into the car behind me.  I have gotten to the point where if I can get through the light without having to wait-it will be a good day.   I used to wear the same exact interview outfit until I didn't get my first job wearing it.  Never again will I wear that outfit when interviewing for a new position.    I kiss my hand as I run through a red light.  I make a wish and bang the roof as I drive under train tracks.  I wish upon the first star I see at night. Like I said-it is quirky things.  Broken mirrors, black cats and going under a ladder doesn't bother me.  I guess I believe more in good fortune than bad.  Unless it is forgetting to have Pillow wear her bow during the Cowboys game, that would be very bad luck.  

 

Dear Self: Blogtober14

 

Dear Self,

With each day that passes, with each year you have grown in age, you become wiser. You have made a few mistakes in your life-but you take those mistakes and turn them into lessons and are better off for it.

For some reason though, you just don't learn from one mistake.  If I can give you just a little advice-that even your younger self from just an hour ago would listen to, you would be a lot happier.

Don't take that one last bite.  Seriously, it is never worth it.  Yes, food is delicious and some of it (like tasty enchilada casserole) will be hard to turn down that last nibble (or mouthful) but you will be in a much better place if you didn't put your fork to the lips.

Right now, you are sitting on the couch uncomfortable.  Your belly hurts. You feel like your tummy will explode.  Was that one last bite worth it?

No.

So going forth, as soon as you feel the hunger pains subside while eating and the instant you hit satisfied, stop.  Seriously.  There will be more food, you will get to eat again later. 

You really won't regret not taking another bite.  Well unless you are in Boston eating your favorite foods only they have to offer.  Eat away and suffer the consequences.

Celebrity Doppelganger:Blogtober14

I asked Boyfriend who would play me in a movie.  In my younger years, I was told I looked like Sarah Michelle Gellar, but honestly I think it was just my former blond hair and *maybe* our nose shapes are kinda similar.  So basically, the same hair color.   Anyway-Boyfriend was no help.  He told me had no idea, I had no idea so I immediately did the first thing I do anytime I don't know something- I went to google.  Searching for celebrity doppelganger generators, and this was one of my results:  

 

I don't even know what to do with this.  First-am I really that manly looking? And why is it that the only woman who is on there is Asian?  Did the generator somehow know my last name and decide that I'm Asian?

Luckily, my life isn't so remarkable that a movie will ever be made about me so we don't have to worry about who would play me.  And if they had to pick one of the above celebrities, I suppose it could be worse!

 

Favorite Book: Blogtober14

I used to be an avid reader, as in at least one book a week.  And then I had kids. I traded in my beloved books for blogs and magazines-short bursts of stories and information that I can easily pick up and drop as needed.  Recently though, I've been attempting to read more books.  I just love diving deep and getting lost into someone else's story.

“I think... the secret is to just settle for the shape of your life takes...Instead of you know, always waiting and wishing for what might make you happy.” 
― Wally Lamb, She's Come Undone This book is a lot of people's favorite books, but for a good reason.  There are so many lines that just speak to me.  I haven't read it in some time, but each time I read it-I find myself reflecting on my life just a bit differently.  In fact, time to go to the library to pick it up again!

Maybe She's Born With It...:Blogtober14

I wear makeup, on average, once a week.  I'm not the best at applying it and no matter what products I use (from drugstore to high end) makeup just does not last on me.  I've even had airbrush makeup where several  hours later I look like I'm not wearing any.  So mostly, I just don't bother.

There are some mornings though where I will look in the mirror and realize that I look like I'm still asleep.  My eyes may be open, but because they are so heavy I look like I haven't slept in weeks.  Well I do have an infant-so really that is how I look at all times.

A few swipes of my favorite beauty product-mascara-and I instantly look like I slept for a solid five hours straight (my goal in life right now).  

I'm not partial to any specific brand/formula.  I have long lashes naturally, so I typically stay away lengthening versions.  I also have an extreme dislike for formulas that clump my lashes together-I prefer my lashes to still look natural, just darker and thicker.

Do you have a favorite mascara?  I really would love more recommendations-I love to try as many out as possible, my best friend knows me well and has gotten me mascara samplers for Christmas to satisfy my obsession of trying out different formulas.

My Pictures Are Perfect: Blogtober14

So all of the pictures I post are 100% perfect, that is why the only editing I have to do is maybe a crop within the Instagram app itself.  
Ok, I lied, obviously.  Well in all seriousness-I don't edit any of my pictures (and I'm sure it shows) except for maybe making it black and white, using the filter on my iPhone camera itself.

I'm a huge, huge fan of Instagram.  It is my favorite form of social media.  It allows me to do two of my favorite things-document my life and tell a story.  I just am not a fan of editing the pictures.  I don't know what I'm doing and when I make attempts I think it looks like I am trying too hard.  90% of my recent pictures have not been edited-maybe early on in my Instagram days I might have used the Earlybird filter a few too many times.
When I was little, my mom told me I would be able to wear makeup when she couldn't tell I was wearing makeup.  I didn't understand that at all, until of course I learned how to apply makeup properly.  I feel the same way about editing pictures.
 I love following photographers who use their iPhone exclusively for their Instagram accounts.  Of course they have raw, natural talent well beyond what I will ever have but it inspires me to see what I can partially attempt-editing photos where it isn't obvious it has been edited.
Any suggestions for the best resources? Online classes? Websites? I would love to learn more!

What?!: Blogtober14

I adore Boyfriend, truly.  There is no other person on this planet that I would rather spend my days and evenings with.  This also means he has the ability to drive me insane more than any other individual.  
A common scenario in our household: Boyfriend and I are each on our respective couch and in "our" spots.  We are catching up on our DVR or working on our computers, maybe indulging on a yummy snack.  When all of a sudden I hear this noise an I look up to see what could be the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard for most people.
Boyfriend just looks at me and says, "What?!"
I don't know if it is the fact that I am so intune with Boyfriend or what, but he is the loudest eater in the entire planet.  No one else seems to hear it but I can hear every single crunch, gnash and swallow of his food.  He is about 15 feet away but it is like he is right next to my ear.
I feel so guilty that it bothers me so much-all he is trying to do is eat his food so I genuinely try to ignore it.  Without fail though, the anger inside of me just starts to build until finally I just have to give him that glance that lets him know he needs to cool it for a second.  I know it is my own issue and I should never make him responsible for it-but I swear sometimes he might slurp just an extra bit louder to drive me insane.
Recently, one of my friends posted this article which labels my problem-misophonia.  While I don't think I am an actual suffer of misophonia and it is more of a pet peeve with Boyfriend, I certainly understand what those people are going through (though on a very small, limited basis).

Dream Vacation: Blogtober14

My dream vacation is super, super simple.    

 

I want to spend a week sitting on a beach doing nothing.

Boyfriend and I enjoy going on trips.  We have our spurts of traveling-some years we will go on 5-6 trips, then some only 2-3.  We always talk about taking a trip to some all inclusive resort and just sit on a beach enjoying the surf and sun, but other destinations end up taking priority.

It isn't that I don't enjoy our other vacations, I do-but they are so go, go, go that I need at least a day or two after to recover because I'm so exhausted.

Just today Boyfriend and I decided that between our birthdays (late January, early February) we are going to put my flight benefits to use and go to a beach somewhere, just the two of us.  It won't be a long trip-maybe three nights, but it will be a well needed break of doing nothing.

I Don't Do Well With Blood:Blogtober14

Every parent's biggest fear is losing their child, that goes without saying.  Tragically-the mom I look up to and want to emulate in so many ways lost her daughter just after her first birthday.  Her daughter's death forever changed any naivety I had that losing your child isn't an impossibility.  Her loss impacted me greatly.   My second greatest fear also involves my children-having one of them getting hurt seriously, which is something that really could happen, especially with my little daredevil .  

 

Of course I don't want anything to happen for their own sakes, I never want my children to feel the amount of pain a serious injury would cause.  But I'm also extremely fearful of how well I will be able to take care of them in those stressful and difficult moments.

When Baby was about 14-15 months old she was dancing in our living room.  She did a dance move I can only describe as "dropping it like it's hot" and as she was dropping it, she hit her mouth on the corner of our coffee table.

She immediately started crying so I picked her up and carried her into our kitchen and placed her on the counter so I could survey the damage.  That is when I saw that she was bleeding, and not just a bit but profusely.  There was blood all over her entire face, down her shirt-I couldn't even figure out where the blood was coming from.

I finally located the cut, a very small one on the edge of her lip.  I kissed her head with relief knowing it wasn't anywhere as bad as it looked but the next thing I knew I was one the floor looking up at her sitting on the counter, looking down on me.

I've never had an issue with the sight of blood as far as making me feel faintish, but it has happened a couple of times.  Baby gets nose bleeds often-those don't bother me, it is only the time she is bleeding due to an injury where it seems to impact me.

It isn't just feeling like I am going to pass out from blood that concerns me.  About a month after cutting her lip, she fell and busted her lip and knocked her tooth very, very loose on our bed.  I felt as though I was going to puke trying to open her mouth to see if her tooth had been knocked out.  I almost couldn't do it-but I knew I had no choice.  

The physical toll it took on me made me feel so guilty.  How can I take care of my kids if I'm physically reacting so negatively?  How can I be strong for my kids during one of the times they need me the most?

I want to believe that if either kid has a great injury-a broken leg, or need for stitches, I will be able to put aside my own issues until they are well taken care of.  But I don't have that faith, not with my past experiences.  I just pray that I never have to find out!

      

What Makes Me Happy: Blogtober14

Despite what Boyfriend might say, it really doesn't take much to make me happy.  

 

Obviously my family makes me happy.  For me though, it really is the little things.

The good Diet Dr. Pepper for $1 at McDonalds.

A totally clean house.  It is such a rare occasion, but the amount of weight lifted as I look around knowing I have no chores is the most freeing feeling.

Scratch tickets.  I don't play often, but I have enough luck to at least win my money back most times.  Apparently Baby enjoys a good scratcher as well.  Please know we were at the State Fair, I don't normally sit on a street corner with my kid scratching lottery tickets.

 

Rain while it is sunny outside.

Naps.  Naps are my favorite.

Really good dessert.  I don't really have a favorite, but I could eat dessert for every meal.

Waking up at 1:00 a.m. feeling so refreshed that I am convinced that my alarm will go off any moment only to realize I have another four hours of sleep left.

Spending my Friday nights on the couch with a full DVR, Baby drawing next to me and cuddling Pillow and Boyfriend.

A stack of magazines and time to read them.

Finding random pictures on my phone after Baby plays with it.  Yes, she designed a dress with her picture on it.  All real designers like to celebrate themselves.

 

I could sit here and think of thing after thing that makes me happy, and I'm blessed enough that I have the opportunity to experience all of them frequently.